On November 6, we blessed Kastyn and it was a great day. Wesley did amazing and all of my planning and decorating for the luncheon came together really well. It was a great day to honor him and spend time with our family and close friends. However now looking back through all of the pictures of that day, all I can think about is how fat I looked that day!
( Now, before I go any further I just want to say that I am not trying to be a complainer, and I am not trying to get any special attention by having people tell me how good I look just because I think I look fat.)
I suppose every girl/woman has the same problem, no matter how skinny we are, we always think we are fat and look at our imperfections. But I have to say that being someone who has never worn a bigger pant size then 10(Which was after my miscarriage and right when I got pregnant with Kastyn) it is really hard to walk into my favorite clothes stores and see all the pants I want to wear, but I am to afraid to try them on to have the disappointment in the biggest size they offer still being to small. I am so in love with Kastyn and even though I gained over 50 lbs during my pregnancy, he was so worth it. But the problem is, no matter how much I love him, it doesn't help me love myself. And that's what I need to do.
I wish that I was not going to be this serious about loosing weight right during the holiday season. But I guess that it will be good for me to realize that if I can do it during this time of the year, with all of the food and goodies tempting me, then I can do it anytime! When I commit, I have never had a hard time loosing weight, so that will be what I need to do, I just need to COMMIT!!
Go you! I have always struggled with my weight and sometimes I feel like I have things in control, but lately I keep losing my focus. Thanks for this post!
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